Unfolding My Potentials

Busy.  Distracted? I become distracted by being "busy."   In the past, I often used "busy" as an excuse to avert my focus from what's harder/scarier:  My own goals.  Ah, distraction as a defense mechanism... Since the start of 2018, I have been living in an "in-between" period. A transitional space. So much unknown to keep me busy! Becoming overly involved in my external environment Distracted.   Making connections, yes, but NOT keeping my personal goals close and clear. I am envisioning: My heart's goals, my passion's goals as A solid core  Surrounded by the details  (people, places, circumstances, timeline)  that are Unknown and flexible Completely controlled  By the creativity of the universe (Not me...lol) How do I remember?  How do I not get lost in life's details (willingly or unwillingly)? For me, I talk to friends about my goals (so they can gently hold me accountabl...

Last night commenced a new round of Visual Journaling, held in a new space. Today, I am reflecting on the night, and process. I return to my pages. I read, observe, accept, and soak up the images until next week's group... I see fluid communication with words, images, colors, layers, compounded by pages. Can't define them to understand, must open heart to FEEL in order to understand. The group, the process, the products are not linear; therefore easy to define.  Such as life... There's something about Visual Journaling in a group... Sharing time, space, creativity with other individuals.  Arriving, with or without a plan Being surprised. Laughing. Connecting with others.  Finding safety.  Healing. Current events, motherhood, childhood, art processes, metaphors Coming together. Community. Being part of a greater whole.  Delight. Offering pieces of ourselves. Being welcomed. Unconditional love amongst family, friends,...

Hey there! If you follow my Instagram or Facebook, you may have noticed that the Visual Journaling group is starting back up! Last fall, it took place weekly at Art Exchange in downtown Long Beach, then it hibernated through the winter to begin again this upcoming Monday April 23rd in its NEW home at Inspyr Arts on 4th Street. *Please see the bottom of this post for the when, where, and how info.* This group is very special to me.   I love it because it supports adult "artists" AND "non-artists" in a creative self-care  practice . One cannot hope to "finish" their Visual Journal in one day, and that's also not the intention of keeping any journal.   The intention of this process is self-care.  Adding a page.  A page is a part of the book.  It is not the whole.  It can help us to acknowledge that self-care is ongoing bits and pieces, occurring here and there.   I believe this helps take the pressure ...

I wasn't sure what I wanted to write about today.   Feeling scattered.  I know what's technically on the day's agenda: Attend meeting with a group of amazing, creative, entrepreneurial females. Go to work for a few hours. But there's always more than that on my mind and in my heart.  Mind: Light a candle, do laundry, vacuum the apartment, wash my hair, feed myself, write grocery list, buy groceries, read a book, check agenda items off list, connect with other humans... Heart: Compassion, excitement, fear, wonder, determination, love, and so much more, in varying amounts and combinations.  And more and more. I'm feeling busy, but not at ease in it. I have worry of being swept away; not grounded; losing connection with my Self; becoming lost; forgetting something... These happened in my past when I thrived on being "busy", therefore, "productive." But, I define these words differently now... Lastly, I'm ack...

I've been having conversations with friends in the last week, and a theme has emerged: A seemingly simple realization.  To focus on living life moment to moment.   Choosing to incorporate consciousness. Mindfulness.  Acknowledging each moment as it comes. Staying curious, with a sense of humor.  Stopping despite the momentum in our "busy lives" to find the sacred. Not wanting to look back on this moment with longing/regret. Listening to the tiny bits of information received from the universe.  Reaching out to connect with others when we feel the urge. Saying thank you . Saying I love you . Saying I appreciate you and I'm thinking about you , when we feel the urge.  Giving freely; with no expectations to get something back in return.  "Living in the moment" has become a bit clich e ́ . Maybe there are certain ideas about what this looks like: Giving up everything to travel the world. Going bungee jumping. Facing external fears... ...

Something I've have been realizing lately... Every day is different. My initial reaction to this is anxiety.  I want to have control. Want to plan. Want to KNOW. Then, I say it again:  Every day is different. I try letting it sink in... Slowly softening and opening to the truth of it.  Looking past my knee-jerk reaction/rejections of the thought. Allowing myself to see the opportunities and excitement in this truth. When I'm feeling discouraged/groundless/grasping, and through this lens of discouragement, I foresee more bleakness in the future...  I remind myself: Every day is different.  This reiterates that I DON'T know. And that's a good thing.  Even when I have an established routine.  This routine reassures me (falsely) that I  know what to expect of my days.  This knowing may even lead to an element of boredom/restlessness because "Everything is planned out." But, really: Every day is different....

Today is the Spring Equinox. It's always helpful for me to pay attention to the cycles of the Earth, as it has an impact on my own cycles of motivation, productivity, energy levels, etc. Spring is about starting anew. Awaking from hibernation. Reconnecting with the world.  For me, it involves cleaning and rearranging; making space for new opportunities. Today, I am thankful for bird sounds and house plants.  We are transitioning into a new season. Moving from quiet introspection and a metaphorical hibernation in darkness, back to warmth and light, feeling vulnerable but voracious. I am ready to get my fill. Ready for action. How will I celebrate? Lighting a candle from The Wilderess , bought early winter and saved. Peony and Cardamom. I bought it because it smelled like spring to me.  Getting pictures taken of some of my artwork (by Stickley Studio ). Beginning of something new. I can offer prints and postcards of my art. Making meals u...

A favorite saying of mine is, "Stop 'should-ing' all over yourself." It's funny, but also true. Sometimes it's easy to look at life with a critical eye and a negative perspective leading to thoughts such as: I should do this.  I should be that.  I should be meditating regularly.  I should exercise.  I should read more books, watch more documentaries, be more active in politics, create more art... and so on. We can get caught in a spiral of beating ourselves up because we're not meeting certain expectations. And how does that help us?  Does it get YOU excited about doing any of those things? For me, all the "shoulds" make me just wanna give up!  Which is the opposite of what I want. When I notice myself getting caught in the "shoulds" (sometimes it's immediate, but other times, it might take a day or two!!), I try to shift my perspective into letting myself be, as I am, in that moment. This is the same as accepting mysel...

Today, I wanted to share about being introverted, and being able to take care of myself as such. Being introverted means that 1. Being around people depletes my energy at varying rates and 2. I am able to regain this energy and recharge by being by myself, preferably in my home. Does NOT mean- I hate people, I'm socially awkward, I don't have fun... so on and so forth. lol Conversely, extroverted people gain  energy by being around people.  This isn't cut and dry because introversion and extroversion exist more on a continuum, but I won't get into that right now. I am constantly learning how to take care of myself as an introvert.  Situations and circumstances are always changing, so I feel like I really need to know myself well and I have to be comfortable with setting boundaries when needed. As with any self-knowledge adventure; one must strive to be gentle and patient with the self.  I have to remind myself of this ALL the time!  I am a perfec...

Portion of Water Lilies by Claude Monet Been thinking about my ever-changing world of emotions.  Every day contains a multitude of emotions: Excitement, hope, joy, exasperation, disappointment, determination, confidence, confusion, dejection, relaxation, calm, sadness, yearning/nostalgia, love, gratitude, delight, curiosity, tenderness, resignation, nervousness, impatience... That was just yesterday!  Not sure if that combo constitutes a "good" day or a "bad" day... It was a "day." I am working on observing all of these emotions, and refraining from creating a story or assigning them meaning.  It is tremendously freeing to acknowledge I don't have to come to a conclusion about it at all!   This, then, becomes my work on acceptance of the present moment AND of the inevitability of change. I am accepting of all of these magnificent feeling experiences, without judgment and without needing them to involve any other person.   I am wallowing ...

Today, I am remembering to be grateful and accepting. Nonjudgmental. Focusing on appreciating every moment of my life, rather than analyzing it and always determining "something's missing". Recent mantra: May I be happy with myself as I am, with my life as it is, in this moment.  When I first started with this mantra (which I got from a friend), I had to call myself out on all the automatic "but" thoughts: "But, I'm waiting for x to happen" "But, I have bills to pay" "But, people are starving/dying somewhere"... Within the process of noticing these defensive thoughts, I realized there's always an excuse (ie. a choice) to not be happy. There is a pattern of thinking that we get stuck in; that happiness is always around the next corner...  By examining this as a pattern  (not as something that is integral to my identity), I am reminded that I don't want to keep waiting for "perfection" in m...

What: In this month that celebrates love, set aside some time to celebrate and cultivate a love for your Self.   I will lead a guided meditation and mixed media art-making process for you to create the perfect "gift" for yourself in this moment. It will be a little package to take home, that fits in your pocket, and is filled with visual reminders of your amazingness!  All materials will be provided, just bring yourself and someone you love, if you'd like! <3 Self-love is a journey, join the workshop and continue on your path, whether you're just starting or have been traveling for years... Workshop is offered for $25 per person. Forms of payment accepted can be found Here . When: Thursday, February 22nd, 2018 7-8:30PM Where: Sacred Roots Holistic Healing 2841 E Broadway, Long Beach, CA 90803 RSVP: UnfoldingPotentials@gmail.com

For this week, I've decided to write about my (current) experience of The Job Search.** I have been adamant about having a very different experience from previous Job Searches, which involved depression and endless amounts of self-judgment.  Here are some of the things I've been doing: Stubbornly riding the waves of emotion vs. being taken down. Working through frustration and impatience with the process. Transforming my perspective.  Accepting anger.  Going running.  Making art.  Finding life and magic in the in-between; the transition space; the ambiguity. Being dedicated to accepting/loving myself/my life in each moment.  Asking for help when I need it. Staying grateful.  Meditating. Paying attention to emotions in a nonjudgmental way.   Witnessing my dance with fears and attachment. Noticing beliefs about and threats to aspects of my identity. Being open. Listening to others. Sharing my thoughts/feelings about the expe...

Let's think a moment about our current self-care strategies (like I ever stop thinking about them!).  For example, when you come home from a long day's work, or when you are stressed about a conversation you had with a loved one, what do you do?  Sometimes there is a favorite TV show or a bubble bath in order.  Or a nap.  Or writing in a journal.  Or eating delicious food.  In this post, I want you to notice what you do, and what it does for YOU! The following is a technique that invites awareness in the moment.  Hopefully, it will spur an ongoing process.   I will give examples, then you can start identifying your own. Sometimes when I'm stressed I ________ for Self-care: * Binge-watch Netflix.           What is my intention?            1. Bring my spirits up, meanwhile gaining space from and perspective on the stressor      ...